31 Days of Five Minute Free Writes ~ Day 2: “Afraid”

It’s been a loooooonggg time since I’ve written here or participated in Five Minute Fridays, but here I am after receiving an email about the 31 Days of Five Minute Free Writes led by Kate Motaung. So the goal is to write for five minutes on the given writing prompt.

So the clock begins now:

What am I afraid of? What does the word afraid mean to me? Are afraid and scared the same thing. I don’t know that I’m actually afraid of anything. I have a dislike for certain things, and it’s actually not a word I really use much. So Lord give me something… Afraid… Yes, these writings are very impromptu and unplanned. Sometimes we’re afraid to step into the unknown because the truth of the matter is we don’t fully trust God to light our path. We’ve become so accustomed and comfortable with the now or how we’ve always done things, it’s like if it’s not broke why fix it? Don’t really like that quote anymore. It may not be broken, but it can be improved. Many times we’re afraid simply because we lack knowledge or the awareness of something. When we learn more, we become less and less afraid. Afraid is a limiting word… a word of limitations. Sometimes we have to challenge ourselves to confront the thing, person, situation we’re afraid of and when we do, often times we find there was nothing to be afraid of in the first place and now you’ve found a new love, a new activity, a new something… I heard someone say, “Wow, If I knew it would be this fun, or this…. {times up}… I would’ve done this a long time ago.



What Has God Put In Your Heart?

What has God put in your heart? What did you used to be excited about and now you think it’s too late, it’s too big, it’s not possible? Get your passion back. You haven’t missed your opportunity, you’re not lacking, and you didn’t get shortchanged. All it takes is one touch of God’s favor. ~Joel Osteen~

I thought this was a good reflection question (and starting point) as I am now refocusing on what I’m most passionate about and what I feel God is calling me to fulfill.

When I first contemplated my home-based business three years ago after an unexpected job loss, I wanted to work with ministers and their personnel. I saw several needs and had all these different ideas that I was excited about, but admittedly, I let ‘fear’ creep in. ‘How could “I” pull this off?’ First mistake aside from the fear was thinking “I’d” be doing things alone. Other factors came into play as well including financial needs. My true passion was soon replaced by transcription work that I didn’t as readily enjoy, but it fulfilled my financial needs to an extent. I always wondered why God continued to show favor in regards to transcription work, but not necessarily coaching/consulting.

Several times, I even asked what was I missing.

What was I not doing or understanding?

Something someone shared with me recently that has been a constant reminder: “Concern yourself with God’s business first and he will take care of your needs.” (Matthew 6:33) This has challenged me to see things in a different perspective, in God’s perspective. He’s not concerned as much with the how as he is with the what. Meaning, are we truly ready to fulfill the purpose for which he has called us to fulfill? I had to ask myself that. Am I ready to fulfill my purpose or do I want to keep making irrelevant excuses? I’m READY to fulfill my purpose. I don’t know how it will unfold, but I know there’s a mission with my name on it.

So what has God put into my heart? A strong desire and compassion for Ministers and their personnel.  I recognize and understand the responsibilities empowered to you and how, if not careful, it becomes less of a ministry of service to others and more of a job that leaves you drained and seeking comfort from the exact things you often deliver others from.

This was my passion three years ago and it remains my passion even today. It’s not too late. It’s not too big, and where God is concerned, it’s definitely Possible.

So here’s to New Beginnings!!!

Made in God’s Image


Morning Story and Dilbert

Morning Story and Dilbert Vintage Dilbert
September 18, 1999

Kleenex Alert!!!!

Dr. Frederic Loomis faced a very difficult decision, should he allow the deformed baby about to be delivered to live or die. He had only seconds to decide. Dr. Loomis had delivered hundreds of babies, but this one was different.

The infant lay in a breech position, promising at best a difficult and dangerous birth. One of its feet stretched only to the knee of the other leg. Furthermore, the child was missing a thigh. The mother, a frail person visiting the sterile delivery room for her first time, wasn’t aware of the grossly deformed child struggling to survive.

Dr. Loomis closed his eyes; at his fingertips squirmed a pitiful creature yet unborn. Would not the most loving thing be to detain the birth long enough to cause the child to be stillborn? He agonized within himself. Will this kid not be considered…

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I’ll Make You A Rainbow

Morning Story and Dilbert

Morning Story and Dilbert Vintage Dilbert
May 21, 2014

Kleenex alert!!!!  

There is nothing that can truly prepare you to lose your own child. Looking back, I’ve often thought the doctors should have written a death certificate for me as well as my son, for when he died, a part of me died too.

Andy was almost twelve. For over three years he had been battling cancer. He’d gone through radiation and chemotherapy; he’d gone into remission and out again, not once but several times. I was amazed at his resilience; he just kept getting up each time his cancer knocked him flat. Perhaps it was his pluckiness and grit that shaped my own attitude about Andy’s future, or maybe I was simply afraid to face the possibility of his death; whatever the cause I always thought that Andy would make it. He would be the kid that beat the odds.

For three summers…

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